Warning Signs, Part 1

I recently finished reading Extreme Evil: Kids Killing Kids by Bob Larson.  A police officer friend of mine, who works in a high school, asked why I am always reading these types of books.  Another friend said, "that's not recreational reading, that's research."  Either way, I work in schools and I have children so I take in as much information as possible.  In the book, Mr. Larson goes into specific details about the more notorious school shootings.  By interviewing students at the schools and his experiences, he is able to provide insight that is often ignored by the media.  He also writes on violent video games which I have previously touched on.  Over the next few posts, I am going to detail what Mr. Larson titles, "6 Warning Signs A Child Might Be In Trouble."  Mr. Larson does a great job of finding the common traits in the perpetrators of these violent acts and is able to single out the traits that parents can observe, and get help for. 


Trait 1 - "Obsessive Involvement with Immoral and Violent Cultural Influences"

Every generation seems to have an issue with the music and the cultural norms that influence their children.  For years parents have obsessed with controlling what their kids watch on television, listen to, and take part in.  Times change, music changes, and what is allowed on television changes.  Can you remember a time when certain words were not allowed on the radio?  Do you remember who the first husband and wife to share a bed on TV were?  What does all that mean? 

The key words are obsessive, immoral, and violent.  While we cannot always impose our morals on our children, we can control the level of violence we expose them to.  We can also try to control, or curb their level of obsession.  When a teenager's habits and actions move from an interest, even a favorite past time, to an obsession, there can be a problem.  And there is a keen difference in being a fan of something, and obsessing over it.  When "gangster rap" music came on the scene, many people tried to censor or ban it.  Kids everywhere, from the actual gangsters to suburban rich kids, quickly became enthralled with the beat, the lyrics, and the lifestyle.  Many people became fans of the music and the groups, but there were those that became obsessed.  Their dress, their friends, and their actions changed.  Many of them started committing crimes in order to validate their "street cred" with people they never knew. 

Regardless of what you feel is immoral or violent, enjoying it is one thing, obsessing over it is another.  Parents, educators, and interventionists should seek help, or begin the conversation with anyone who is displaying this trait.