A Small Town, Feel Good Story

While the news is usually filled with stories of bullying and violence in schools, it is nice to see a community support one of their own.  What’s even better is when students support one of their own. 

Azle, Texas is a town of just under 10,000 people approximately 16 miles northwest of Fort Worth, Texas.  The town has one high school, Azle High School.  At this high school is an 18 year old senior named Mariah Slick.  Mariah is a cheerleader for the school and last year was nominated as class favorite.  This year, she has been nominated for homecoming queen.  While these would be special moments for most high school girls, what stands out here is that Mariah has Down Syndrome.  One of the school’s teachers summed it up best,

"I really think if Mariah wins, we win. Because it really shows the character of those who voted," Chapa said. "That they would see past what is typical and acceptable and see the value that she adds. Even though she doesn't fit the part of what you would see as a queen."

Kudos go out to the students, teachers, and the parents in this community.  For the full story, read here.

Smash or Pass

The premise is simple; a picture is uploaded and viewers are ask to comment on whether they would “smash” (have sex with) or “pass”. 

Facebook pages, groups, and profiles are created with names such as “(random school name) Smash or Pass”.  The spelling can at times be unusual in a way to mislead adults.  Common uses are “smasho’pass and smashuhpass.  The creator of the page then broadcasts it around the school, and in no time, hundreds of students are in a common group, sharing pictures of each other and asking for the above comments.  While many chalk it up to innocent fun, or kids being kids, the content of these pictures and groups is what is alarming.  Young boys and girls are taking extremely revealing pictures of themselves in various poses for the others.  Obviously, the more revealing the picture, the better the comments, which is the intended goal. 

Users can also upload pictures of others and use this as an avenue for humiliation and bullying. 

This is just yet another reason for parents to monitor their children’s internet and social network usage.  Children need to be taught that not only can there be consequences for posting pictures online; they also lose control of the use of those pictures.  Smash or pass pages are also the destination for many pictures obtained through “sexting”. 

A simple search on Facebook of “Smash or Pass” reveals many pictures, including the one used in this post.  If you are curious or want to know about your area, open a Facebook profile and search the school name along with smash or pass.  The results may shock you. 

Sidenote – if the movie “The Social Network” is accurate, Facebook was basically started as smash or pass site.  Pictures of female students were paired up and viewers were to vote which one was more appealing. 

Beaded Bracelets

Just a quick note on a new trend which is hitting schools all across this area…

In what is just another of history repeating itself, kids are now making and wearing beaded bracelets for each other to wear.  There is no pattern to these things.  Boys and girls of all races and in most grade levels are wearing them.  While many just wear them for fashion statements and/or to honor their friends, gang members have started using them for their purposes as well. 

It is easy to hide the name of a gang, gang initials, or gang sayings in the bracelets.  Most people will just look at the group of bracelets and just chalk it up to “kids being kids”.  However upon further investigation, it is easy to notice the gang identifiers. 

The good news is that most schools are capable of addressing these in their dress code guidelines. 

Mob Mentality

A few years ago in Chicago, Illinois, a young man named Derrion Albert was beaten to death by fellow students.  Video of this incident made national news as this young man was punched, kicked, hit with a 2x4, and beat some more when he fell to the ground.  His friends pulled him into a nearby building where he died, and it was all recorded on cell phone video.  There were conflicting stories as to what happened, but one thing on the video is clear; there was a mob of students who fed off each other’s rage.

This week in Dallas, Texas, a similar story was released.  Following the first high school football game of the year, a “mob” of students was recorded on a store surveillance system taking over a convenience store, throwing, destroying, and stealing items.  The lone store clerk attempted to intervene when he was assaulted by a group of these students.  2 young girls pulled him to safety, which very well may have saved his life.  A second story about this same “mob” of students was subsequently released, and detailed how they targeted another young man earlier that evening.  What started as a fight in the stadium spilled out into the street.  This young man was beaten, stomped, punched, and thrown onto the hood of a car, cracking its windshield.  And there were adults around, and thankfully for this child as well, someone intervened before he was seriously harmed. 

As surveillance tapes are reviewed and witnesses come forward, it is likely that many of the involved students are not normally aggressive kids.  Human beings are still animals in a sense and when the pack animal or mob mentality takes over, the results can be tragic; just like when regular citizens fueled by passion and alcohol, riot and destroy cities after their teams win or lose championship games. 

However, this too all starts with parenting.  Attending football games on a Friday night is a big part of the high school experience.  But getting arrested for a felony is not.  Parents need to train their children, and more importantly, either attend the games with them or make sure they are properly supervised. 

Rachel's Impact

This past Thursday was an eventful day.  On Thursday morning I had the great opportunity to sit through a presentation of the Rachel’s Challenge program to a middle school assembly.  Rachel Joy Scott was the first victim of the Columbine High School Massacre on April 20, 1999.  Her father and brother have since started the Rachel’s Challenge campaign to teach students and adults how to effectively deal with bullying and other issues at schools.  Rachel’s saying was basically that with a simple act of kindness, you could “start a chain reaction.”  Rachel left such a legacy and touched so many lives prior to her death just by the way she lived.  There are over 20 little girls out there named after her, based on her life, her choices, and her acts of kindness.  Her message is simple, yet profound;

1 – Look for the best in others and eliminate prejudice

2 – Treat others the way you want to be treated

3 – Choose positive influences

4 – Speak words of kindness not cruelty

5 – Forgive yourself and others.

Imagine if we all headed those 5 simple steps.  What if we started living like this tomorrow?  How many lives would be positively affected? 

As I said, it was an eventful day.  On Thursday evening, I attended a wake for a friend who also died young the week before.  His wake was filled with memories about how this young man loved everyone, made time for everyone, and would give anything he could to anyone.  He would give his time, his talent, his ear, and his smile.  And although this young man will not be remembered in the way Rachel is, I like to think that the legacy he leaves behind, to his 3 children, was very similar; acceptance, love, and kindness.  RIP Gary ‘Clutch’ Flores. 

For more information on Rachel Joy Scott or the Rachel’s Challenge program, click here.

Maryland Getting It Right!

In Wicomico County, Maryland, the school district is responding to a new state requirement much differently than a different Maryland county’s school board that I highlighted this previous post. 

In this case, the initial step is to set-up monthly meetings between the school administration and law enforcement.  This is an often forgotten link in combating gangs.  Although these are two very different agencies, they service the same customer, the community.  And one of my favorite sayings is directly mentioned in the article,

"We have gangs in our communities," Turner said. "And schools reflect what is going on in those communities."

The school board is also taking appropriate steps to train staff and highlight the differences between actual gang members and the “noncriminal cliques.”  This is HUGE!  This shows that this particular school board is taking the time to learn the differences and to not label kids.  Another key measure being taken here is the use of a former offender.  This can bring credibility to the program from the community angle, and provides someone who can give input from a perspective that is different than the school board or police. 

There is one comment mentioned though that could be cause for future problems;

“The policy also stipulates a special file for reports and investigation of gang activity be kept in a secure location at each school. Records on individual students would be destroyed when the student graduates, permanently leaves school or turns 22 years old, whichever occurs first.”

The board needs to ensure that this policy does not conflict with state mandates on database collection, record purging, and juvenile record keeping.